I know I've written about him before, but I just wanted to write today about the amazing husband I have.
JTD comes from a family with lots of siblings, and family has always been an important part of his life. Many men with that kind of background would have been very hostile and angry at me for my infertility issues. However, he never said a word in anger over the last five years of struggling through everything. He's supported me through drugs and pills, through surgery and IUI. He's given me shots and gone to embarrassing appointments. When they had to postpone the embryo transfer and freeze our little ones after our IVF due to my severe ovarian hyperstimulation, he never said a word (even though we were both deeply disappointed) - he just held my hand while they drained fluid from me. He's been by my side and taken care of me through two frozen embryo transfers. When I've apologized to him for my body, he's said without pause that they were our issues, not mine.
When my body couldn't support Maddie last summer, he never said a word in bitterness or anger. Instead, he quietly put my emotional welfare and grief ahead of his own. While I was in the hospital, he came home without me even saying a word, and put away the positive pregnancy tests and belly cream I had in my bathroom, stored away the baby books I had strewn about. Even though he was in as much pain as I was, he wanted to protect me from these things when I was released from the L&D. To this day, he just holds me when I need to cry.
Now, it brings me so much joy to hear him say, "I was in A_____'s room last night looking at her crib, and..." It fills me with gratitude to see him talk to her and feel her kick. He waits on me hand and foot while I am stuck in the house, and doesn't complain. I have done some things in my past of which I am ashamed, but he truly inspires me to strive to be better.
Thursday, April 22, 2010
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15 comments:
This post made me cry. He sounds like such an amazing guy, and you deserve him. I love it when people really love each other, it's so beautiful. What lucky babies Maddie and A are to have you both for parents.
You are so sweet, I just can't even say. He truly, truly is amazing - and I just wish you and everyone else the same happiness and love. HUGS to you.
I'm so glad you have JTD! Sometimes I read about couples on LAFC and my heart just breaks for those whose grief takes them in different directions. It's not easy...that's for sure but it is survivable.
I'm also just so happy that you're both able to hope again!
I am so glad that you have TOIAW, too, Rachel! We've talked about that a lot - we know of couples from long ago whose grief split them apart, and it just saddens me greatly.
This makes my heart feel so good-I was just tonight having a talk with my husband about all of this. My mom lost a baby at term in between my living sister and I, and my dad blamed her--or at least my mom specifically felt like he did. They are divorced now, and she says it all started to go downhill then. Sometimes I get so scared thinking about what I would do if I had to do this without him---it scares me so much I can hardly breathe! We are so lucky in some ways!
You are so beautiful!
xoxo
That above post was me, http://almostamother.blogspot.com. I swore I was signed in, but I guess I was signed in under my real name!!! :)
Oh, Famille - I am so sorry for your mom's loss, and that saddens me greatly. We have a good friend whose parents split in a similar situation - I wonder if it's partially that they just weren't as comfortable talking about this back then? You are so wonderfully sweet!
It brings such joy to my heart to know that have such tremendous love and support from your spouse and that JTD has never once made you feel at fault for any of the struggles that you have gone through to conceive and carry your babies. It is only fitting that amazing and wonderful you have an amazing and wonderful husband!
F and F, of course you would make me cry - you have such a gift with words! I am just truly blessed and amazed at him every day.
Oh he sounds wonderful lady - exactly what you deserve!
He sounds so wonderful. Give him a hug for me! I can't believe how much our husbands go through with us and they do it so silently.
It sounds to me like you most definitely have a keeper. He sounds a lot like my husband. After the loss of our son last year, he took care of me- and has given constant reassurance to me that none of this (infertility, loss, bedrest, etc) is my fault.
I'm so glad that your husband is so understanding and wonderful- it's always pleasant to hear/read/think of the good things and not always the things that break our hearts
I guess he's okay. Just remember - I had a romantic candlelight dinner with him first. :)
What a keeper!!
Angie, this is a beautiful post. Our husbands have bad to endure so much that the truly do deserve props. He is awesome. :)
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