I had to wake up super-early today and drive the 60 minutes down to my RE's office to get my blood taken for my estradiol levels. The process is honestly just so low-key with an FET, but I woke up at least a half an hour before my alarm and just laid there, certain that they were going to call me and tell me that the E2 levels were off and that we'd have to cancel the cycle. I don't know why - maybe it's just preparing for the worst and hoping for the best, but it was this very real fear (which I never even considered during our last FET or our fresh cycle - then I was overstimulating). I'm just waiting now for the call with my levels - hopefully this fear can go away here shortly.
I have had the song "Daughter" by Loudon Wainwright in my head this weekend - it was the song my husband and I instantly thought of when we found out Maddie was a little girl. I had always wanted a little girl, and was just so excited. The song is just so beautiful: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lVam-fshUgw
Physically - 6.5 Mentally – 8
Emotionally - 6.5 Spiritually - 8
Monday, October 12, 2009
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5 comments:
I can imagine how you feel Angie as I have some similar feelings with preparing to start trying again and feeling like your body is not going to cooperate. I am going to leave my faith in God and hope for the best. *hugs* Hope all goes well. I will be praying for you.
Thanks. If it were just an issue of waiting for a month, I could handle it - but this cycle alone involves thousands (yes, that is the multiple form of the word thousand) of dollars that are not covered at all by insurance. It's just a lot of stress.
I still find myself waiting everyday for the other shoe to drop. I can only imagine the stress and anxiety you are having right now - I am thinking of you.
You are just such a sweetheart. :) Everyone's kind thoughts mean so much.
Sending hugs... I remember our hour long drives to the REs office and the wondering of what else could go wrong at times... That hour down, I would try to center myself for the day because I knew that there was no way I'd be able to do it on the ride back.
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