I am just so filled with emotions right now. I am so grateful for the cheering section across the nation. I am so happy that yesterday went so well, and so hopeful that it works (and afraid for any outcome). I'm so sad that we don't have Maddie, and so concerned that she knows this isn't to forget her or "move on" (which is an impossibility).
Thank you, everyone, for your thoughts, prayers, and words. They mean so much.
(Also a quick edit on the previous post - I am blaming it on the Valium, but I got the date of my beta wrong. It's 11/17.)
Friday, November 06, 2009
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
12 comments:
I am marking my calendar!
Oh and I can certainly understand why you would be dealing with so many emotions. Maddie knows you aren't trying to replace her or move on. I'm sure she is so excited about getting a sibling. :)
You are so very sweet, Heather. :) Thank you so much for caring, and for your wonderful words. That is so comforting.
Angie, can you explain the beta thing? I see that on LFCA, but don't know what that means...is it a test? Is it something about the baby? Either way huge *hugs* Praying for burrowing to take place. :)
Maddy knows she is not forgotten. She is going to be there for her mommy every step of the way.
Jess - it's a blood test. They do an initial blood test of your hcg levels at about 12 days post-transfer to first make sure you're pregnant, then another one about a week later.
Thank you. :)
I am familiar with that now. I have always thought of it as your HCG levels and to make sure they are doubling etc. Thank you for the education. :)
I will eagerly be awaiting till then... And the emotions are completely understandable. For the rest of our lives our joys will be intertwined w/ our grief and sadness over the ones that are missing... :(
Jess - yeah, it's called all kinds of different things, depending on who you're seeing!
Amanda - thank you so very, very much. And you're right - and I'm so sorry that you have to be familiar with those emotions (if that makes sense).
Yeah Ang, glad the Dr said everything looked good. I'm still keeping you in my nightly prayers and Maddie will be so excited to have a sibling. This one is the angel of Maddie, and with her watching over this little bundle of joy. Take care and keep up the good spirits.
Love Amy
Thank you so, so much, Amy - we really hope to be able to give Maddie a sibling. :) Those prayers mean so much.
The processes of trying-to-conceive, getting pregnant, and parenting after a loss are more difficult and filled with more worry and uncertainty than anything else in the world. I know what it is like to question your decisions and to worry that you have made the wrong choice, and I also know the sweet reward of having made those difficult decisions and choices. Maddie will never, ever be forgotten, replaced, or removed from your hearts or memories . . . if nothing else, your love for her will grow as you move forword in this process.
Oh, that made me cry - all of the sentiments, because they're just so true and sweet. This has been such a hard decision - and I think what I've found is there can't be a "right" time. We'll never be "over" our babies - so it's just trying to honor them and still try and be happy. Thank you so much!
Post a Comment