I don’t think that most people who meet me think of me as uber-ladylike. I grew up with a lot of guy friends, so I’m pretty used to conversations ranging on different topics. However, when it comes to myself, I really only participate in what I like to call “polite conversation” most of the time.
Let me illustrate. When my OB asks me about my regularity during pregnancy, I can barely squeak out an answer. I made my parents go and get any feminine products I might need throughout the entirety of high school, while I waited in the car. So, when the nurse at the peri’s office asked if I track cervical mucus, I think she could tell the answer by the horrified look on my face. I’m not a prude - I don’t mind if people talk about these things to me, but it’s certainly not something about which I’m going to share (or even think) willingly, even with my doctor if I can avoid it.
I just bring this up because it is so weird to compare this with what you have to “just get used to” when doing IVF and infertility treatments. I don’t really have any problems sharing what I’m injecting into my body today, what the process involves, and so on. I’m not all that comfortable with the constant stream of new people checking out my goods, but it just seems so weird that I will do that, and not talk about poop. Hunh.
Things are going well. 10w3d pregnant today. I live in a constant state of fatigue and nausea, but I’m happy to have the opportunity. I have my next OB appointment a week from today. We had planned on telling my family on New Year’s (they postponed our Christmas due to weather), but now they want to get together at a restaurant in town that, while delicious, most closely resembles a cattle barn in terms of noise. I’m not sharing news like this in that environment. They may just find out after the cerclage, or whenever I choose to tell them. We rarely get together anymore, so it's not like they'll see my stomach that is protruding more and more daily (I've been in maternity pants for three weeks). I'm not sure what to do.
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
12 comments:
I don't think I'd want to share that news in that environment, either. Hopefully you'll have an opportunity soon, but obviously it can wait until you're ready.
You will know when the right time is to tell your parents. I probably would not want to tell my parents in that environment either.
Funny about how you don't mind talking about the IVF and injections, but other things you do. I used to be that way, but now I am open with talking about it all to my doctor. ; )
Megan - thank you so much! I might just take this as a sign that I shouldn't tell them until after the cerclage. There's no timeframe, like you said! :)
Jill - I'm so glad that you have that comfort zone! I'm trying to work up to feeling more comfortable with some of those things than I am now, at least with my doctor! I don't have to blog about them or anything!
I'm catching up on a lot of posts here - First, I'm so sorry about your grandmother I will keep her in my prayers.
I know you'll tell your family when the time is right for you. I agree that telling in a loud place would be weird. We told DH's grandfather about our second pregnancy in a resturant. He thought we were getting a dog.
Thank you so very much for the prayers, Cheryl. That means so very much.
I just burst out laughing when I read about your grandfather's response. That's exactly what I'm expecting - my grandmother never wears her hearing aid, so this is probably the worst possible locale!
Definately share the news when you are ready. Its amazing how open we are with our obs in during this time.
We didn't tell anyone until right before my cerclage. And, at Thanksgiving I felt like I was busting out of my maternity pants. It must have been so obvious. But, I didn't care. I told people when I was ready. And, telling people was not like telling them with Ella. I was so cautious bc I didn't want anyone to get too excited and I didn't want them to think I was over Ella. So, what I'm saying is, tell people when you feel ready. No rush. Even if it's obvious your preggo, they will probably leave you alone.
It's funny bc I text message back and forth with my doctor quite often. Everytime I have a freak out, I send her a message. I have texted her about things like cervical mucus and constipation. Afterwards, I always think, I can't believe I put that in a text. But, I think she's used to it.
I would definitely wait until you are absolutely ready to tell them. I'm always torn as to when I'll announce next time. One part of me wants everyone to know from day one to get as many prayers circulating as possible. But the other part of me wants to keep it to myself until I absolutely have to tell. I haven't decided which part of me is bigger yet.
Yay for just over 10 weeks! Hopefully that means morning sickness will end soon.
Jess - thank you so much!! I'm with you - I just think maybe this is a sign the time isn't right to tell. I'm willing to accept signs! :)
Bree - that makes me feel a lot better. I've had the EXACT same concerns about all of this - this certainly doesn't mean that I'm over Maddie, and it doesn't mean that things are going to be okay just because we're at X number of weeks. I love the idea of texting your doctor! :)
Heather - you're exactly right, that's been one of my concers. I want as many pipelines to God as I can get, but I just feel like this is kind of ours to share when we feel like it. My mom will spread it far and wide, and I am just SO not ready for that.
The only suggestion I have after reading that is try drinking things with ginger for nausea.
Best regards,
Tom Bailey
Thank you so much! :) I'll give that a try - anything has to help!
Knowing when to 'spill the beans' is hard enough in a 'normal' pregnancy! I wore baggy shirts, sweatshirts, and coats for months when I got pregnant with Briar - I actually had a neighbor (whose house I walked by everyday taking Cooper to school) ask if I had started babysitting someone else's baby when she saw Briar for the first time . . . she had no idea that I was pregnant. The fear that something is going to happen is so very difficult, if not impossible to overcome. I know for me part of not wanting to tell was not wanting anyone else to take even one ounce of anything related to my pregnancy from me . . . after we lost Quinn, my mother-in-law told me that I would never know how truly devestated they were. She and father-in-law had only known about the pregnancy for 2 weeks! You will know when the time is right and the situation is perfect.
(P.S. It seems like my last few comments have included a bit of my own dumping of feelings and emotions - I am sorry! I hate that anyone has had to go through such a tremendous loss.)
Post a Comment